Yeah? Well, You're An Idiot. [Open]

[harryjamespotter]

To The Unfortunate Receiver Of This Letter ,

I'm having a supremely bad day today and I just need somebody unbiased to talk to. Or rant at, whatever. My apologies in advance.

Honestly, some days I just don't bloody understand my best mate. I try and take it calmly, but do you have any idea how hard it is to walk on eggshells around someone all the time so he doesn't blow up in your face like a bloody prat?

He's supposed to be my mate, but some days I really wonder. Last year was hell, and I swore to myself I was never going to fight with him like that again. It wasn't even my fault but I was going to see to it we didn't fight this year, and well.

We see how well that went over.

I get it, I do. She's a Slytherin and that house has been nothing but hell for all of us. But you know what, when I'm standing here with well over half the school calling me a liar and acting like Cedric died for nothing, I could use any ally I have, and that includes him. I don't care about houses mate, not when things are like this. I just wish he could see that.

The Boy Who Lies

[siriusblack]

Harry,

Its probably for the best that when sending a message you want received by someone you don't know, you don't use an owl that knows you and the people you frequent as well as Hedwig does. I can't say I'm upset to hear from you... though it'd be preferred under better circumstance.

You have to understand that not everyone copes with death the same way. You've had more exposure than most your age, and you handle it with a phenomenal amount of maturity that I don't expect most of your classmates are capable of, no matter how much they may try and understand, or how much they really do care. To be honest I don't know many adults that would handle what's happening right now as well as you are.

From what I'm getting out of this though, you've formed some sort of friendship with a Slytherin girl, and... accompanied her to the dance this evening? If that's the case, I have to say I agree with Ron completely. I don't know exactly what's gone on between you two but dating a Slytherin isn't under any circumstances the answer. I'm not at all sure where this came from, but its not a good idea.

House lenience is your preference, but the Sorting Hat places people for a reason, and if this girl in in Slytherin she's in it because she's capable of and likely to be manipulating you without a care. With the way I imagine people are treating you, it's almost opportune. I personally wouldn't listen to a word she says. I think that Ron is only looking out for you, and in good reason.

Harry, I get that things are difficult, but even if she was a Gryffindor- the best looking Gryffindor you could find at that- you put your best mate before the girl. Always.

Snuffles

[harryjamespotter]

Snuffles ,

Snuffles,

I think I've written it and thrown it away about three times now, so I'm just going to give up and write it.

Bloody hell.

There, now.

I love Hedwig, really. She knows me better than even Ron and Hermione do. I find it rather amusing that she seems to be under the impression I'm in need of an adult. It could have been worse. I can only imagine if she brought this to McGonagall.

All amusement aside, I have to say I'm not feeling all that mature these days. Oh I come off that way, sure - if anything, I'm turning into a bloody decent actor - but really, I just feel frustrated. Umbridge is a beast, I can't bloody stand the woman, and she actually had the gall to call Cedric's death an accident.

I've been turning to some old coping mechanisms to deal with her, I won't lie. Hermione's liking the result, but I haven't even told Ron yet, because once again its all eggshells with him. He'd take it in some stupid way I'm sure, and I just don't have the patience to fight with him on it.

I didn't want to fight with him this year, and really with all that's going on, I could have used him in my corner.

That said, Snuffles, about the Sorting Hat -

*Writing continues in a different angle, as though Harry stopped writing, and started up with another quill*

I know its always supposed to be mates before girls, but between you and me I have a funny feeling I know which way Ron would turn if given the chance with the girl I know he fancies. So in that light, it doesn't matter what house she's in or what she looks like, I'd defend my girl as surely as Ron would his in that aspect.

I get he's looking out for me in his own way, but it would be nice if he could show a little faith in my judgement. Astoria's different. I know for a fact there is more to Slytherin than manipulation and cruelty, and...as much as I would like to Snuffles, I can't tell you how I know that. Just, trust me when I say I knew it long before I knew Astoria.

Harry

[siriusblack]

Harry,

So... you're actually dating a Slytherin? I'm sure there's more to the lot of them, but its more things that aren't any good. Are you sure she hasn't charmed you or something? You've learned about Amortentia haven't you?

You're not the only one that's frustrated, Harry... Especially not where Umbridge is concerned. A couple of people were over earlier and from the things they told me, to put it as bluntly as possible- she's a bitch.

Besides that, she's from the Ministry. Of course she had the gall. These people wouldn't know how to tell the truth (or figure it out, for that matter) if it slapped them in the back of the head. It's in their job descriptions.

What exactly do you mean by old coping methods? She's honestly not worth your time... But if you've got so much concern around her, running her out of Hogwarts doesn't sound like a bad idea. I don't see how your friends could disagree. You could probably get half the staff to help you with that.

There's always that weird feeling when your best mate is infatuated with a girl, trust me. No matter how much you think they might choose her over you.. they can be surprising. Maybe he would choose the girl he fancies, but you can't know for sure. And if you do it first, well what do you expect when it's his turn? I'm only saying I'd give Ron a bit more credit. And you too, for that matter. Someone that's your best mate since first year wont just up and turn on you.

Well- Never mind.

But a best mate isn't always someone that tells you what you want to hear. I imagine that's what Astoria has been doing. And that's all fine for aquaintances. Ron wouldn't be a real friend though if he didn't tell you when you were doing something he thought was stupid.. Not to say that what you're doing now is stupid. If it was a few years ago and Hermione showed up to the dance with Malfoy, I can't imagine you'd have reacted much differently.

Snuffles

[harryjamespotter]

Snuffles ,

I can have Hermione and even Madam Pomfrey check me for hexes, jinxes, and mind altering potions if it'll put everyone's mind at ease on this matter.

I know I'm not the only one who'd like to see her run out of here, that's for sure. I'm currently in correspondence with some professor or other who seems just as frustrated as I am. At least I presume he's a professor - certain choices of words cluing me in that way, at least.

I can also say in good confidence that Professor McGonagall has no love lost where Umbridge is concerned. Yet its not like she, or any of the staff, can really do much about it, now can they? Umbridge has the Ministry to back her and frankly, I don't want to see any Hogwarts professors losing their jobs over the toad and her warped politics.

So really, we can't really count on the professors to put an end to this. All of them are walking on ice as it is. If anything is going to be done, we're going to have to do it ourselves without adult support. Which, frankly, is something I'm so used to by this point I can't even be arsed to care.

As to the coping methods, its nothing you have to worry about Snuffles. When I was younger, I learned that the best way to avoid Uncle Ver - Du - Lets just say I'm doing a lot more reading these days. And homework. I actually managed to scrape an 'E' on a potions essay about a week ago - I'll never forget the look on Snape's face. I'm determined to make the greasy git cough up an 'O', just to stick it to him.

I know Ron means well, in his own way. Sometimes though, it'd be nice if, even if he thinks I'm being an idiot, he would just let me be an idiot without completely fighting me on it. Then if things go bad, he can say I told you so mate, and we can move on, or if things turn out alright, we can just put it behind us. Its the butting heads all the time that bothers me.

I suppose if Hermione had popped up with Draco I would have had some questions. After all, he's openly racist, rude, and frequently attacks all of us. Astoria though, has never even been involved in Draco's crowd of friends. She's a bit beneath their notice, to be honest.

As for her telling me what I want to hear - well, she doesn't always I'll tell you that much. Though she does make some comments that are bloody hilarious that I probably shouldn't laugh at, but really who cares about Pansy Parkinson anyway? her humor is less vindictive than the sort who hang out with Malfoy.

I'm not saying she's a saint. I'm sure she isn't. Then again, I'm not as "golden" as the world seems to believe either. Or wait, am I still the Golden Boy? Wait, let me check the Prophet, because I get a new bloody title every month it seems...

Im not bitter, honest.

Harry

[siriusblack]

Harry,

I don't think anyone would object to that.

To be honest, I think if Umbridge wanted one of the professors out of a job, they wouldn't actually need to do anything wrong (in her eyes or the general population's). The Ministry's got such a tight hold on the media that they can take a story with no evidence in their favor (evidence against them even, I'd bet) and by tomorrow it will be running without a doubt in anyone's minds. Of course, that's the fault of the people the believe the rubbish in the Prophet too. It's staggering really. The thing isn't even well written.

I'm assuming that I'm included in this nonexistent adult support? I could think of quite a few that beg to differ that statement, myself included. But then, there really isn't much I can do to help either way so I suppose it doesn't matter. Eventually someone is going to need to up and do something about it.

You're reading and doing homework and don't want me to worry? That's good.. I think?. Pleased to see you've pulled one on Snape... Though if you can't get an 'O' out of him, he's probably the one holding back. I wouldn't put that past him. Does the man even give 'O's?

Well why would you want to be an idiot when you have the chance to stop beforehand? I mean there's nothing wrong with letting your mates look stupid once in a while, but not if it were something important, you know. Snogging off with a Slytherin (have you two done that yet?) isn't something I expect you want to say oops over.

Just because someone isn't actively rude, doesn't mean they don't have malicious intentions. It really is usually the quiet ones that do the most damage. That's practically how all the Slytherin girls are, anyway. The come off 'alright' compared to Malfoy but then they end up marrying guys like him and becoming no better than a Death Eater themselves. I'm not sure if you've ever met Draco's mother, but she's a very good example.

Bitterness? Heh. Of course not. I've never even heard the term.

Chin up, Harry.

A new title each month can't be all that bad. Something fresh to throw around, at least. Change up the way everyone's thinking about you. Its better than having the same one half your life, I can tell you that. At least more than half of your are complementing.

Snuffles

[harryjamespotter]

Snuffles ,

Right. Talking to Pomfrey then.

Good point - since when does the Ministry need a reason or evidence? Bloody corrupt when you think about it. At least the Muggle system demands proper trials and promotes enough freedom of speech that blocking the truth isn't something in the pocket of the politicians. Innocent until proven guilty, and all that.

I didn't mean any offense by that statement Snuffles. It was more just a frustrated observance. I could easily write you at least fifty instances in which I turned to an adult and found myself faced with having to do it myself, without even having to think too much. I know there's adults in my life I can count on, and I know you'll always be one of them, but sometimes there's just nothing you can do, even when you are willing to listen and want to help. So that wasn't really meant to be harsh or anything, and that's why I crossed it out. I think I need a better quill.

The homework and reading thing is a long story, and its best if I dont get into it. I'll get that O though, even if I have to wring it out of him. I'm thinking I'll incorporate Aralunes into my next essay somehow - be a bit creative on it - and mention how they only poison females, which is a fact I've come to discover one will only find after extensive and deliberate research. If that doesn't shock an O out of him, I can surely think of something else.

I imagine I won't be saying 'oops' over Astoria, though we haven't snogged yet. Shall I keep you posted on that?

A new title each month gets really tiring when the list of what to call yourself in order to be a smartass gets so long you confuse yourself.

I'm just going to call myself the Heir of Slytherin again, solely to be an ironic arse. I solemnly swear it.

Harry

[siriusblack]

Harry,

How'd that go?

Do the muggles really keep to that? Sort of thought it was book legend or something... Remind me sometime to go propose that to Fudge though, that last one especially. I can see his face turning that ridiculous shade of red now. And then he'll start stammering... I always seem to have that effect on him.

It's fine, Harry, I wasn't taking offense to it. You're completely right. There's a big difference between wanting to do something and actually taking action on what's right. A lot of it is the type of person you are really, but I suppose there's an age where most people come to think that they have to pick and choose their battles or they wont ever win. I can't say I agree with that personally -it's got it's good and bad sides, more of the latter really; I'd be doing something if I bloody could- but that's what I'm sure McGonagall or Moony would tell you if you asked them.

Your essay seems shocking enough to me. Of course, anything about poisoning females is right up old Snape's alley. I'm sure he'll appreciate it all nice and written out. He's very interested but daft you know, so he could use all the help he can get.

I still have no clue why you're spending time researching Aralunes (other than to thoroughly annoy Snape), but something tells me I'm not going to be getting an answer any time soon. Not through letters at least.

Of course you should tell me. She's not going to be your first one, right? Keep me posted on how things go with the Slytherin girl in general. Unless things with Pomfrey eneded it, in which case, I suppose we're done talking about her and this problem's solved. She shouldn't be your first though, really.

Heir of Slytherin? Why on earth would someone come up with that? Who came up with that? That's not even funny; just bloody stupid.... Actually, that said I'm not that surprised. Don't see why you'd want to go brining it back up though. Seems abhorrent.

As far as your better titles go, you can really just pull any of them any time. It's not like people are forgetting about you. That's the only good thing about the mangled mass media... Oh and when you only have one title, it's much harder to come up with new and inventive smartass variations. Not that it isn't a fun challenge when you've got nothing better to do.

Snuffles

[harryjamespotter]

Hey Snuffles ,

All clean!

Well, they're meant to and I do find that they try at the very least. Sometimes they slide, but for the most part they put some effort into attempting to uphold the laws they've been sworn to uphold.

Snuffles, you make everyone with a spine who doesn't know the truth quake in their boots! If Fudge saw you, he'd turn into a puddle, never mind stammering.

I wish you could do more Snuffles - I know how much you hate that place you're in. If I could find a way to make it right, I'd do it in a heartbeat, you know I would. Just like I know you'd help me in a heartbeat even if it might not be smart for you to do so.

Actually about Snape and females - actually no, nevermind.

I'm just trying to bring my grades up is all. I mean really, the wizarding world may not want to face the truth but the fact of the matter is I saw the truth and like it or not, I will have to face it at some point or other. Annual near death experience party and all that. I may as well be as prepared as I can be. If I apply it right, a lot of what I'm learning now could really help me in the future. Or get me killed faster. Somehow I don't think permanently changing a Death Eater's robes Umbridge-worthy pink will be winning me much favor.

Well, for the record things between Astoria and I are going fairly well. Aside from the obvious tension and distrust on both sides. Slytherin isn't fond of her being with me at all and have made their opinions about as clearly as Ron did. Hermione doesn't really trust Astoria either, but she's giving her a chance - level-headed girl, that Hermione. I'm grateful to her for not being too upset with me, despite the fact Astoria's not the most popular choice. I really like do her though.

Didn't anyone tell you about - oh, right. Lupin was in third year, and because of that mass murderer breaking out of Azkaban, everyone was pretty distracted from the events that went on in second year. So there's no way you could have known.

Its not something I can safely put into writing, but lets just say when the Chamber of Secrets opened, people had reason to suspect me of all people. So I was rumored to be the Heir of Slytherin, but that sorted itself out after I killed the Basilisk after the Chamber closed for good.

This is true - all of it. Hmm. Perhaps its time to come up with a new name for you BAD IDEA. I did not write that.

Cheers,
Harry

[siriusblack]

Harry,

Just the fact that they attempt gives them a leg up on our Ministry. Idiotic gits they all are. It's actually funny when you think about it. Muggles still don't have much more than the defendants word, do they? Lot of good that gets anyone anywhere. I don't see why we bothered coming up with Veritaserum or Prior Incantatio if they're never going to use them. Especially when it may help them reveal just how idiotic their being.

And you're right. If I can evoke a reaction that brilliant from the idiot it'd be a waste not to put it to good use. The stammering happened in Az- a highly monitored and contained environment where Fudge believed he had the upper hand. I believe, however, that a puddle of that man would do wonders for the wizarding community. Not to mention his name is Fudge- not exactly something easy to take seriously. How he got elected.. How did he get elected?

Harry, sometimes theres a good enough reason to do what you know isn't smart. But, at the moment, you shouldn't be concerning yourself with this. Focus on your school, your friends, that annual near death experience party. You know the truth, and preparing for it is much more important than anything anyone else might call you because of it. It's much easier to doubt what you've never seen than to loose the things you have. There's no merit in pretending that the world is a safe place when it's not, but it's human nature. We put up walls.

I can tell you from experience that Death Eaters aren't fond of pink robes... but if you ever get the chance, its worth it.

Mhmm, I remember hearing about that. I can imagine that would have been fairly distracting. Amazing feat it was. It must have been anyway, to get the Boy Who Lives out of the paper, eh? Good you know you got some kind of a break. Of course, figures they'd suspect you for everything, including things that stupid. Nobody else would have gotten as much attention out of it. I guess that much hasn't changed... But you killed the Basilisk in your second year? I know I'd get quite the disapproval from certain people for this reaction- but that's truly impressive.

Now, the one time you actually manage to properly scratch something out. Come now Harry, part of the reason this owl is so late was because I had to figure out what you didn't want me reading. And it was not a bad idea either. At least, whatever comes out of it is bound to be an improvement. Of course, we can say you didn't write it if that makes you feel better. My apologies, again, that this is extremely delayed. It underwent enough rewriting that I actually had to go hunt down parchment and I'm still not pleased with how this came out.

Snuffles

ooc: note the two sentences of vague responsibility and the fact that i completely ignored the astoria paragraph. both myself and sirius have acknowledged that this is a crap letter ;P